It Never Rains in Sunny California

(Not really California, but it was either this or a photo from Ireland)

Except today. And maybe tomorrow.


I love the rain. We don’t get rain enough here in Southern California. Which is probably good because no one seems to know how to drive in it. The raindrops fall, the ambulance sirens start. Maybe people are too busy staring at the water drops on their windshields.

Is it…raining?

Or did someone spit on my car when I went under that last overpass?

Then, wham, before they have the answer, they’re suddenly in the backseat of a Volvo.

People think California doesn’t get weather. We do. We have four seasons here in Southern California, just like everybody else. They just have different names.

Dry, fire, rainy and mudslide.

Some years the dry season gets pushy and lasts all year. Fire season can happen at any time. The rainy season is elusive, but when it does arrive, it usually does so with a vengeance. You see, the soil here is baked by the sun most of the year. Dropping rain on it is a little like pouring water over terracotta tiles. (Las Vegas, I know you can feel me on this.) The water hits, the water runs off. Causing flash floods, etc. Or worse still, the water hits, the ground absorbs, the entire hillside comes down on someone’s house.

California. Always the drama queen.

Our version of Fall involves boulders rolling down onto PCH. (Actually the cliffs above PCH tend to crumble at random. Beautiful drive, but watch your head.) Our color scheme is backward. The hills are green in the winter; brown and tinder dry in the summer.

Hence, fire season.

Which also can be sparked by the ferocious Santa Anas that roar through the desert passes into the city, tearing up trees and pushing palm trees into sparking transformer boxes. Hurricane force winds with no hurricane. They really need to be rated. A Category 3 Santa Ana hit the Pasadena area just last week, howling through there like an express train, ripping out trees, taking out the power.

We can pack a year’s worth of weather into about five minutes.

So today we are on Storm Watch. (Cue dramatic music.) Every TV station in Los Angeles will be broadcasting weather updates all day long. If a street floods, a reporter will be standing in the water. If a tree falls down, they’ll send helicopters. Overkill? Perhaps. Slow news day? Maybe.

Until a trailer park gets washed away.


4 thoughts on “It Never Rains in Sunny California

  1. “California. Always the drama queen.”

    That should be the next theme of the next ad campaign promoting travel to the Golden State.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s